Understanding and Overcoming Money Addictions - It's more than Spending Addiction

When we talk about and think about money, it can evoke very strong emotions. Sometimes we want to avoid it altogether. Even when we earn enough for our needs, we feel like it's still not enough. In fact, 73% of Americans rank their finances as the number one cause of stress, according to a survey from the American Psychological Association (APA). Often, we feel overwhelmed and stressed. When I talk with people, rarely do they feel hope and joy in their financial situations. Today, I want to dive into some of these emotions and how they can present within the context of money addictions.

1. Spending Addiction
Many of us are familiar with the concept of spending addiction. People who suffer from this often feel the need to spend any money they get and more, usually in an attempt to feel better. This can be seen in individuals who have experienced financial abuse in the past, where they weren't allowed to spend. Once they're free to spend, it can get out of control.

For those dealing with spending addiction, it's essential to seek help and begin by creating a realistic budget. But more than that, using tools like the SMART spending method can help you make intentional choices and curb unnecessary spending. George Kamel’s SMART spending concept offers a simple yet powerful framework:

• S - Self-Awareness: Ask yourself, Is this going to add value to my life? Does it have a purpose?
• M - Motive: Consider, Am I buying this for the right reason? Is this retail therapy or an emotional purchase?
• A - Affordability: Reflect, Is this in my budget?
• R - Research: Ensure, Is this the best quality or price? Have I explored all my options?
• T - Timing: Evaluate, Is this the right time to buy this? Could it wait, considering opportunity costs and priorities?

By pausing to ask yourself these questions, you can break the cycle of impulse spending and make better financial decisions. It can also help to have an accountability partner who can talk you through purchases before you make them, ensuring that your spending aligns with your long-term goals.

Did you know? According to a 2023 study, approximately 6% of the U.S. population may struggle with compulsive buying disorder, with women being disproportionately affected.

2. Debt Addiction
Debt addiction can wreak havoc on financial health. It often looks like someone constantly opening new lines of credit—credit cards, personal loans, payday loans—and using one to pay off another. This behavior often leads to a vicious cycle of debt accumulation, poor credit, and in extreme cases, bankruptcy.

For help:

• Debtors Anonymous is a resource offering support for individuals struggling with debt addiction.
• Create a debt repayment plan and make it a priority to avoid opening new lines of credit.
• Seek financial counseling to manage and reduce debt systematically.

3. Financial Codependence
Financial codependence occurs when individuals feel compelled to give money to others, even to their own financial detriment. A person with this addiction might continually provide financial assistance to friends or family members, draining their own resources. This can lead to stress, resentment, and eventual financial ruin.

Overcoming financial codependence involves:

• Setting healthy boundaries and recognizing when financial help becomes enabling.
• Teaching financial literacy to those you help, so they can become self-sufficient.
• Work with a therapist to address the guilt or obligation associated with helping others financially.

Setting boundaries and helping others learn to manage their own finances can be incredibly empowering for both parties. For those in need, it offers hope and confidence as they gain the skills to handle their money independently. Rather than feeling helpless or dependent, they can take control of their situation and build a stronger financial future for themselves. This approach not only fosters self-reliance but also strengthens relationships, as it shows your loved ones that you believe in their ability to succeed.

4. Money Hoarding
At the other end of the spectrum from these mentioned addictions is money hoarding. This goes beyond simply saving towards goals or being wise with your money. It’s an obsession with holding onto every dollar, driven often by fear. People who hoard money may fear they will never have enough, or that financial security is always just out of reach. This fear can prevent them from spending on even small things that would bring joy or comfort. They may avoid social activities, turn down opportunities to celebrate with friends or family, or refuse to invest in experiences—all because of an overwhelming fear of future financial instability. Relationships can strain as they distance themselves from others to protect their financial resources. 

To overcome money hoarding:

• Acknowledge the fear and Create a balanced budget that allows for both security and enjoyment.
• Set aside a portion for experiences and give yourself permission to spend.
• Recognize your financial safety net and that responsible spending won’t leave you without enough.

By assigning some of your money the job of having fun, you can begin to trust that your future needs will be met without sacrificing the pleasures of today. Learning to trust your budget, will give you the confidence that you can spend and still have enough to cover your needs.

5. Deprivation Addiction
Deprivation addiction looks like intentionally living on the bare minimum, avoiding raises, promotions, or investments that could improve your financial situation. People who exhibit this behavior often feel unworthy of having more, or believe that living with less is a moral virtue.

If you struggle with deprivation addiction:

• Seek therapy to explore feelings of self-worth and address any underlying issues.
• Start small by allowing yourself to enjoy small luxuries within your means.
• Develop a mindset of abundance—recognize that you are deserving of financial comfort and security.

6. Money Hunger
On the other end of the spectrum is money hunger—an obsession with constantly seeking more income, new investments, or business opportunities. While ambition is not inherently bad, it can become problematic when it overshadows other aspects of life, like relationships or mental health.

If you find yourself consumed by the pursuit of more money:

• Evaluate your current financial situation: Often, when we take a close look, we realize we already have more than we thought. Instead of constantly seeking new income streams, ask yourself: Is there more I can do to stretch what I already have? By managing your existing resources more effectively, you may find that you’re already in a much better position than you realized, reducing the urge to always pursue more money.
• Prioritize relationships and experiences that enrich your life beyond financial success.
• Practice gratitude for your current wealth and focus on non-financial forms of richness in life.

Studies suggest that beyond a certain point, earning more money doesn’t increase happiness. In fact, research from Princeton University shows that emotional well-being plateaus at an annual income of around $75,000, depending on where you live.

Money addictions, like any other addiction, can be overwhelming and difficult to manage, but they are not impossible to overcome. Whether it’s working with a financial coach, seeking therapy, or joining a support group, there are many ways to regain control. The key is recognizing these patterns and addressing them before they damage your financial future, relationships, or mental health.

If you're struggling with any of these addictions or know someone who is, don’t hesitate to reach out to a professional therapist or to your financial coach. I’m here to help guide you to financial clarity and empowerment.​