Fall in Love With How You Spend Your Money!

February is often about hearts, chocolates, and showing love to those who matter most. But what if, this year, you showed a little love to your finances? Imagine ending each month feeling excited—not anxious—about where your money went and actually falling in love with how you spend your money. It’s possible! Let's talk about how.
Early in our marriage, when my husband was the sole provider for our growing family, we felt like he earned plenty of money to  pay for the basics of life and even some extra on dreams and goals. However, we'd get to the end of each month and ask, "Where did all our hard-earned money go?" We would end up in overdraft nearly every month! And we weren't getting any closer to those dreams and goals. It was a very frustrating and anger inducing place to be in. Now, years later, after learning how to align our spending with our values, we have fallen in love with how we spend our money.

How can you fall in love with how you spend your money?
Step one: Make a spending plan for all of your money.
Step two: Spend your money
Step three: Track your spending (YNAB is a great tool for this)
Step four: Reflect on your spending
Step five: Adjust your spending plan as needed

Make a spending plan for all of your money
Put another way, give every dollar you have a job in your spending plan. Include your savings and your checking accounts. If we leave our savings in an ambiguous pile in our savings account and just call it "savings," we have a habit of saying things like, "Well, we weren't expecting that. We'll have to take it form savings." "There is an amazing sale on this [fill in the blank], but we don't have the money, we'll have to take it from savings." "We want to go on that vacation, but we'll have to dip into savings." Before you know it, that "savings" pile quietly disappears. However, when we give some of those savings dollars the job of "Christmas," or "vacation," or "new boat," we are less likely to "take from our savings." Giving our dollars specific jobs protects them and allow us to use them for the job we gave them.
When making your spending plan, be sure to keep your priorities and values in mind. If you are sending money on anything that you really don't like, eliminate it or reduce it. For example, if you're making debt payments every month, is there a way to pay more to get rid of it sooner, so you don't have that hanging over your head? Or are you paying for so many subscriptions, you've lost track? There could be many things that we spend our money on out of habit, or because our friends/family spend their money that way, that can be eliminated from our habitual spending. Make sure each of your dollars has a job that either is paying for a necessity or is for something that brings you joy and contentment.

Spend your money
You can't fall in love with how you spend without spending. I'm not saying "don't save your money." Money is fungible. All dollars are savings dollars and all dollars are spending dollars. The difference is the timing around when the money is spent. Even if you are intentionally saving, all money will eventually be spent - either by you or by those you leave it to when you pass away. It will be spent. So if it's all going to be spent, let's be sure we spend it on things that are really important to us.

Track your spending
Once you have your spending plan and you're living life and spending your money, you want to track how you spent it. This is how we make sure our money is going where we want it to go. Instead of looking at a lump sum in our checking account, we want to know what that money is doing for us. We need to know how much of that money is left to spend on groceries, or eating out, or our next vacation. Tracking our spending ensures we know exactly how much we have left to spend in one area and still be confident that we can pay for all the other priorities. This was the key that helped us stop going into overdraft nearly every month - track the spending and check the budget!

Reflect on your spending
As we are going along, we will want to review our spending. Are we making progress towards our goals? Have our priorities changed, and therefore we need to change our spending plan to match? Priories may change over time, and that's fine. As they change, we need to be aware of that and keep our spending plan aligned with our priorities. The start of a new year or quarter is a great time to check in on our spending plan. Are our dollars going towards our priorities, or do we need to adjust? Have you noticed a trend to spend more on things that are more of a convenience than a priority? Notice it, adjust and keep going.

Adjust your spending plan as needed
​Our spending plan is just that - a plan. Sometimes plans change. When we made our plan, that was the best intention for our money at that time with the information we had. Sometimes we get new information.
In our spending plan, we have a certain amount of money set aside each month for dining out. However, I can remember a day when I was raising small children and I was having one of those overwhelming "mom days." Some of you may know what I mean. By the time it was time to make dinner, I just didn't have the bandwidth to make it happen. I really just wanted to order a pizza and be done with it. I checked the budget, and our dining out money was gone. I was very frustrated to say the least! It took everything I had, but I made something for dinner and was not my best self for my family the rest of the day.
If I had known then what I know now, I would have chosen to move money from somewhere else in the spending plan, order the pizza and had a better night with my family - quality family time is more important to me than sticking with a rigid budget.
Making adjustments as you go is the best way to stick with a budget/spending plan along the way. It's also a great way to fall in love with how you spend your money.

Falling in love with how you spend your money isn't about perfection—it's about creating a life where your money reflects your values, priorities, and dreams. It's giving yourself the grace to adjust when life throws surprises your way and celebrating the wins when your spending aligns with what matters most to you. As you move forward, remember: your spending plan is a living, breathing guide, not a rigid set of rules. So this February, as you're celebrating love with those around you, take a moment to appreciate the relationship you're building with your money. After all, when you love how you spend, you're investing in a life full of peace, confidence, and joy.