When we talk about and think about money, it can evoke very strong emotions. Sometimes we want to avoid it altogether. Even when we earn enough for our needs, we feel like it's still not enough. In fact, 73% of Americans rank their finances as the number one cause of stress, according to a survey from the American Psychological Association (APA). Often, we feel overwhelmed and stressed. When I talk with people, rarely do they feel hope and joy in their financial situations. Today, I want to dive into some of these emotions and how they can present within the context of money addictions.
1. Spending Addiction Many of us are familiar with the concept of spending addiction. People who suffer from this often feel the need to spend any money they get and more, usually in an attempt to feel better. This can be seen in individuals who have experienced financial abuse in the past, where they weren't allowed to spend. Once they're free to spend, it can get out of control. For those dealing with spending addiction, it's essential to seek help and begin by creating a realistic budget. But more than that, using tools like the SMART spending method can help you make intentional choices and curb unnecessary spending. George Kamel’s SMART spending concept offers a simple yet powerful framework:
Did you know? According to a 2023 study, approximately 6% of the U.S. population may struggle with compulsive buying disorder, with women being disproportionately affected. 2. Debt Addiction Debt addiction can wreak havoc on financial health. It often looks like someone constantly opening new lines of credit—credit cards, personal loans, payday loans—and using one to pay off another. This behavior often leads to a vicious cycle of debt accumulation, poor credit, and in extreme cases, bankruptcy. For help:
3. Financial Codependence Financial codependence occurs when individuals feel compelled to give money to others, even to their own financial detriment. A person with this addiction might continually provide financial assistance to friends or family members, draining their own resources. This can lead to stress, resentment, and eventual financial ruin. Overcoming financial codependence involves:
4. Money Hoarding At the other end of the spectrum from these mentioned addictions is money hoarding. This goes beyond simply saving towards goals or being wise with your money. It’s an obsession with holding onto every dollar, driven often by fear. People who hoard money may fear they will never have enough, or that financial security is always just out of reach. This fear can prevent them from spending on even small things that would bring joy or comfort. They may avoid social activities, turn down opportunities to celebrate with friends or family, or refuse to invest in experiences—all because of an overwhelming fear of future financial instability. Relationships can strain as they distance themselves from others to protect their financial resources. To overcome money hoarding:
5. Deprivation Addiction Deprivation addiction looks like intentionally living on the bare minimum, avoiding raises, promotions, or investments that could improve your financial situation. People who exhibit this behavior often feel unworthy of having more, or believe that living with less is a moral virtue. If you struggle with deprivation addiction:
6. Money Hunger On the other end of the spectrum is money hunger—an obsession with constantly seeking more income, new investments, or business opportunities. While ambition is not inherently bad, it can become problematic when it overshadows other aspects of life, like relationships or mental health. If you find yourself consumed by the pursuit of more money:
Money addictions, like any other addiction, can be overwhelming and difficult to manage, but they are not impossible to overcome. Whether it’s working with a financial coach, seeking therapy, or joining a support group, there are many ways to regain control. The key is recognizing these patterns and addressing them before they damage your financial future, relationships, or mental health. If you're struggling with any of these addictions or know someone who is, don’t hesitate to reach out to a professional therapist or to your financial coach. I’m here to help guide you to financial clarity and empowerment.
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You read that right... I can't stop looking at my budget. And here's why.
Earlier this year, my husband made a huge life decision—he left his 21-year career to pursue a more intentional life, more aligned with personal interests. We LOVED the time we had together during those months of “retirement.” But we also knew it couldn’t last forever. Eventually, we'd need health insurance, and, well... the cash would run out. After four wonderful months together, he accepted a government job to help meet our family’s needs. Now, working for the government is very different from working in the tech industry. One of the biggest differences? The pay—it was a significant cut. To say I was nervous is an understatement. We had commitments and family traditions we cherished, and I didn't want to lose them. But with so much less money coming in, how could we make it work? I even started subscribing to job listings for places I wouldn’t mind working (YNAB, can you hear me?), just in case. I was prepared to give up doing what I love—helping people take control of their finances—if it came down to it. We didn't want to make any big budget changes until that first paycheck arrived and we knew what we were working with. When it finally did come, I sat down, crunched the numbers, and something amazing happened: I realized that, with a few minor tweaks, we could live within our new income without a problem. I was so excited to share the news with my husband! That evening, we had a little budget date. I walked him through my plan, and together, we went through the budget line by line—tweaking here, adjusting there—until everything fit. When we were done, I felt an incredible sense of relief. We wouldn’t have to give up our commitments, our favorite traditions, or the things that mattered most to us. That clarity gave me so much peace and hope, I couldn’t stop looking at the budget. Even now, I find myself opening it up just to admire it. It’s like looking at a piece of art—it represents security, freedom, and the knowledge that we’re going to be okay. Not to mention, I can still keep focusing on my business and helping others find the same peace and hope with their finances. When people tell me they don’t need a budget, or that budgets are too restrictive, I can’t help but smile. For me, a budget brings freedom, not restrictions. It’s what allows me to feel calm and confident about the future. And that’s made all the difference. Four budgeting habits we should all develop...
One: A habit of dreaming That's right, dreaming! It's our dreaming that helps us know what goals we want to achieve. Take some time to envision your life 5, 10, even 20 years into the future. What do you want it to look like, smell like, feel like? Where do you want to be living? What car do you want to be driving? Who do you want to be part of your life? Dream it all up. If you are married, be sure to dream together. You might be surprised at what your partner is dreaming of. Once you have your dream in mind, convert them into goals and get to work. Two: A habit of creating a budget What is a budget? People often think budgets are negative and restricting - something that limits their fun. But a budget is simply telling your money where to go instead of wondering where it went. How it works: each time money comes in, you ask yourself, "what does this money need to do before I get paid again?" then give every dollar a job to do. The job titles are the categories/things you spend your money on like rent, food, insurance, and dining out. Once every dollar has a job, you are done creating your budget. Three: A habit of sticking to your budget Creating a budget is great, but sticking to it is how you really achieve success. So, how can you stick to your budget? The best way to know if you are on track with your budget is to track your spending. When money goes out, you track which category (money job) is being spent from. Doing this will allow you to know how much you have left for that category until you get paid again. There are times when we all forget an expense or sometime comes up we were not expecting and we overspend in a category. Though, we try to avoid it, sometimes, we may need to change our dollar's jobs - borrow from Four: A habit of paying off debt and staying debt-free Use the snowball method to plan your debt pay-off. Make a list of all your debts - smallest to biggest. Then start at the top. Decided how much extra you can pay on that debt to pay it off as quickly as possible. Keep paying the minimum on all your other debts. Once you've got the first debt paid off, take all the money you had been paying towards your first debt and use it to pay extra on the next debt. Keep on snowballing and moving down your list. Why do we start with the smallest debt and not the one with the highest interest? Because it offers you a quick win, frees up cash fast, and helps keep you motivated to keep going. Once you are out of debt, save up for future spending rather than borrowing again. |
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